Top Ten Book-Related Problems I Have

Apologies for postponing my movie review of “50 Shades of Grey,” but it’s taking me a bit longer to gather my thoughts! Goodness knows I have plenty to say about that film, and I don’t want to leave anything out! Bear with me!

So in the meantime, let’s discuss this week’s Top Ten Tuesday, a meme hosted by The Broke and the Bookish. Today’s topic is about all the book-related problems that come up when you’re an avid reader. Reading can be an emotional rollercoaster, so why not explain the ride with some gifs?

1. Too many books. Over 300,000 books are published in the United States alone every single year, and since I read about 20 each year, that’s only 0.000067%. No one can ever make a dent in that enormous TBR list, and that’s crazy depressing.

2. Not enough time. Even if I live to be 100 years old, assuming I continue my annual reading rate, that means I only have time to read 1,500 more books in my life. That might sound like a lot, but all I think is, “THAT’S ALL?!”

3. Not enough money. Ok, so after looking over my budget from last year, it seems that I only spent about $300 on books in 2014. That’s only $25 a month, which isn’t lavish by any means. BUT! We all wish we could make it rain when it comes to books, especially in audio form, which are much more expensive than paperbacks. Sure, I could go to the library more often and get books for free, but boy do I love collecting them (see problem #4).

4. Not enough space. Every year I collect a bunch of new books, and I’m forced to thin the herd. To a reader, that’s like giving away your own children! If I won the lottery, after doing all the responsible things with the money, I’d buy my dream home with a library that could rival Belle’s in “Beauty and the Beast.” No more book spring-cleaning for me!

5. Jumping on a bandwagon too early. There’s nothing like falling in love with a new series, only to realize nobody’s even heard of it. Maybe the movie’s not coming out for several years, so you have to sit there twiddling your thumbs. And you will, because you can’t wait to tell everyone else, “I TOLD you so!”

6. Jumping on a bandwagon too late. The reverse situation is even more painful, because I hate feeling left out of things. If too much time has passed on a novel, I won’t even bother reading it. I’m looking at you, The Fault in Our Stars!

7. Not getting a seat on public transit. This is why audiobooks exist, people! It’s awful trying to read an old-fashioned book standing up, as the train jerks and jostles you around. It’s hard enough trying not to trip with nothing to distract you, so unless I can get a seat, there’s no point pulling a book out of my bag.

8. Floor sitters. Look, it sucks having to buy books (see problem #2). But if you’re a floor sitter, meaning you can be found on the floor of a bookstore camping with a book until you finish reading it, then don’t be surprised when I kick you accidentally-on-purpose. This especially applies in the graphic novel/manga section, since there’s even a term in Japanese for these annoying people. Stop being cheap and taking up space. Buy your book and GTFO.

9. Bad romance novels. Insta-love, Mary Sue characters, and really bad sex. I could go on and on, but just check out my rant from last week’s Top Ten Tuesday! I’m convinced that there must be a circle in hell for crappy romance novels specifically, because there’s nothing worse than expecting a ‘happily ever after’ and getting a ‘never again’ instead.

10. WAITING! I feel for Game of Thrones fans, waiting years and years for a sequel. It’s one thing to get a sequel after several decades when you never knew one was in the works, like Harper Lee’s upcoming release. But when you’re counting down the days until you can dive back into an amazing story? Absolute torture!

So if you’ve got 99 problems, how many of them relate to books? Shout ’em out in the comments!